I hate young hipster wannabe kids soooooo much. Everytime I see one of those fuckin girls in those hot short pants that come up under their bird seed size titties that show half of their ass and those stupid thin headbands that they put on their heads like they are goin to work out I just want to beat the shit out of them. They make me never want to go to festivals and concerts again. I dread thinking how many of them will be there at Coachella. I’m almost thinking not to go. It might be because they are skinny, but I doubt it. I think it’s just a genuine hate I have for their posershitballbreathasses.

Anywho one day soon I will be walking around Coachella with pasties on my nips, a g-string, and cowboy boots. Y’all don’t know me … pilates and that 8-ball I just bought is gonna set my ass straight. Fuck food … who needs it … not me. Taco bell, Chipotle, El Compadre, El Coyote, Alejandros, Burrito king, Del taco, Marias Tinta Pinta, Vamos a la playa, cinco dollares para ti, mucho bien trabajo por que no mas escuela, donde esta comida NO no mas para mi … it’s over. I’m giving you up. I’m shrinking down these coconuts and I’m trading them in for the California raisin.

L-Word recap. I don’t know what’s wrong with me guys, but I am starting to like Tina. Weird I know, but I think she did a really good job playing drunko and I like how she has control over the Bette and Tina situation. Too bad she doesn’t have control over Bette’s barf nugget grandma hair, but hopefully that will come with time. Speaking of California Raisins, I’ve been noticing something that has started to bother me … observe when Shane gets ass and see how she always does this weird thing where she tries to not touch the person while they are making out. It’s almost like a weird African dance. She kisses them and then weirdly contorts her body to have the ugliest slouch and has her arms up in the air behind her as if she will get burned by touching the person’s body. I know she is trying to play this sexy “I’m not goin to touch you but then I cant help it, but then my nipples are too small, oh no my arms are up again, I look like a retard, but I cant touch you, ok fine” freak ass game, but it’s getting old. Next .. I’ll prob get shit for this but during that party scene how did Marlee Matalin hear the music? Obviously I know she didn’t, but how did she dance so on beat. Does she watch everyone else and go by their beat or I’m just lost. Don’t yell at me it’s just a question.

Lastly … Jenny oh god how I hate you. Oh how I want to bash your face in with this disgusting chair that I’m sittin on that looks like it has cum stains everywhere but they are too cheap in this office to buy new equipment and give it to their freelancers while I stare into a computer monitor from 1983. Jenny got ass this past episode people. And she was so embarrassing to watch. One point in particular I’d like to talk about. When her and the new girl go into the closet and the new girl pulls Jenny towards her by her jeans. Then Jenny had all her hair in her face and when the new girl pushes her hair out the way Jenny had this retarded ass look on her face like either she needed to take a shit or cry because she was thinking about those Jewish circus episodes from 2 seasons back or that she hooked up with Max for a long time. Anyways if you didn’t know, I hate her.

Jenny’s look at 6:45 (I just watched it again and I think I exaggerated a bit but just go with it)

Jamsheeds DOITDOIT of the day: Throw a Disney song karaoke party. Only Disney songs. Only at night. Only with booze. Only!